MALHUER chapter one,part two

but, then again,
grady being entertained wasnt really something to be concerned about,he always had a way of stirring up trouble and enjoying it. sometimes, his efforts to distract himself were humorous,like the time his friend blake dared him to give head to a strat cat for ten bucks,two joints and a biographical book about kurt cobain;it had become common knowlege that you you didnt dare grady,especially if he could reap some sort of bennifit from taking you up on the dare,needless to say,grady took up blakes dare,walking away with the money the joints,the book and a few scratches on his face;also claiming that the stray followed him home,that was gradys explaination for his cat,baal.
however, grady also had a dark side.saying darkside,meaning darker than his other side,which somepeople would consider dark,but still it was the side of him that showed a sense of humor that most resembled that of the rest of the human race,and on that sideof his disposition,you could at least want to try and understand what spectres of anguish hysteria,depression or whatever else it was that seemed to rest in the deepest regions of his mind,often sticking out, leaving people to see a somewhat antisocial young man,sometimes his very features would scream "leave me alone or your gonna get cut" without grady having to say a word. it was that side of grady that made the side of him that made the side that most people saw the "lighter side"and it was this darker side that aroused in him his desire to cause trouble that wasnt "fun trouble" but just a show of his sadistic streak that got off on inflicting pain upon others,even if it was something he saw as provoked,usually it was a very,very slight provocation,like that thing with that girl from a couple years ago,ella was her name,whom sophia hadnt met personally,but she heard the story.ella was one of those girls whose names comes up and if you had met her or at least heard of her, somekind of grey blanketof social guilt or sympathy just wrapped around you;ella had an eating disorder,not certain if it was bolemia or anorexia; when she first entered her teens,ella was what one would have called basically pretty,with glasses and a round face with tender and intelligent dark blue eyes along with a mole and olive skin and curly black hair,like her body was trying to find a middle-ground to show both sides of her basque/german bloodline;sje was a bit chunky,but that didnt really halt her from being an attractive teen ager.almost all teenagers have more than a few flaws,but ella took it upon herself to try and make herself perfect,to try and whip herself into shape,a thinner shape.by 16 ella wasnt the somewhat fluffy but healthy looking teenage girl she had been,she was nearly a skelleton,it was unnerving to just to see let alone to talk to this girl,excited about the way she looks,saying she just has to lose ten or 12pounds,and like so many of these fragile young women,she found herself atracted to the disruptive rebellious figure,in this case,grady,whom she had seen around the house often,he being a recent highschool drop out, she asked after gather up courage,if he would to go to the teen dance hall with her this saturday,grady at this point addicted to inflicting pain on others as a way of getting even for the pain he was in,recognised her condition and said,"in your dreams fatass"

turns out gradys sadistic side had its limits.when ellas eysgot to the size of dinner plates the quick smile that flashed on his face and the feeling of GOTCHA that brought a temporary pleasure to him faded quick,and next he saw her he tried apologising,but with ella walking away and usually yelling something like"go fuck yourself ,asshole"which grady deserved,butof which he was perfectly awareand though he said he had no conscience, there was something like one in him that ached severely and the idea of contributing misery on this girl,when it seemed aparent that she had a mountain of it already;still in the comming months there seemed to be something that resembled an unspoken truce,perhaps it was the feelings of alienation in a small town,alienation being the universal language of all teenagers,anyway,and there were a handfull of times afterwards that grady would walk by the cafe and ella would be sitting there, perhaps drinking a coke with a friend,a she would give him a slight wave to which grady would give a muted wave back;perhaps she was expecting more, perhaps she was expecting him to come in at somepoint and say hello or something but grady had felt that because of what he had already done it was best to stay away from her,sophia never really askedgrady how he felt when ella commited suicide.when sophia heard the story later, she thought it was potential material for one of those after school specials,girl get too self conscious, girl tries rememdying what she thinks her problems are,girl alienates friends and family ,girl dies in her room with sarah mclouglin on the stereo,and a stomache full of sleeping pills.thats the way it was told by the folks around here,but from what sophia gathered its tough to tell fi anyone cared about the situation ella was in,none of them could not help but wonder, where the hell were ellas parents,sophia thought that with all of our troubles,one of the biggest factors in our getting so screwed up was wondering where the hell our parents were hen we seemed so close to the edge the only thing that was keeping them from hitting the ground was a breese that blew them back up to the side of the cliff,but somehow thse winds that were so fortunate for her and grady were not able to puh back this thin waif of a woman.as ella plunged,sophia imagined,ella was left alone in that room,not just her bedroom,but in that cold dark windowless room of agony and hopelessnessthat room sitting behind her eyes,and sophia knew that n someway,grady barracaded that door,and that ella couldnt get out.
suicide, that was something that most of the people here whose i.q.s were higher than the livestock contemplated on a regular basis,sophia thought;it is probably easier than than escape, or that is what she thought before this whole situation with befriending grady and just in the nick of time really, he had just turned 18, and decided to sell off the inheritance from his grand- father from a couple years ago,so now that it was all a done deal, since grady would need someone to guide him to keep his ass out of trouble,and he knew it,also, she had been saving up herself, waitressing at the stardust, having to fake that she was flattered by those old,property owning goats and their and their flirts,grady once said that they had to be pathetic,as if you could look at sophia and not see a lesbian,even if you didnt know what a lesbian looked like,sophia looked like one,that ws gradys assumption, at least.and that wasnt even one of gradys worst jibes;once he referred to her as "sofa" or said she could pass for pete roses brother.
but sophia knew he was testing friends, to see how loyal they were,and sohia was going to be loyal at least untill they were setteled,he was her ticket out,and already,they had driven to twin falls before to look at trailers, they think they found the best they could get at that price range, grady sold his property for fairly cheap,fifteen grand,and itll be the small amount that sophia saved up that will pay for the trailer space rent and food until the two of them get jobs there.
just then,sophia herd grady cursing,his head underneath the tarp,'we need the fucking casette tapes or we'll go nuts,'he said.grady stepped in wih a hand full of tapes for the tape deck, his thin index finger pushing a copy of "the best of rod stewart,volume one" into the deck,sophia starts the pickup and they pull out of her drive way,preparing for the newest chapter in their lives.