SUNRISE

its funny to see a sunrise,in portland,over the horizon through the houses and trees and such,and often i am subject to such a pleasant site these days;whether it has something to do with work,if i happen to be working graveyard that night, or if i happen to wake up early or if i had been at a party a little longer than i had originally expected.

seems almot ironic that i would write about this sort of thing i am often disapointed by people who send time on contemplations of sunsets and sunrises and the lot,but i have thoughts i connect with the concept of watching the sunrise with that go well beyond nature and more into human nature.



being a poet,i am obviously subject to drift back into the past, which i am as guilty of cheese-ball sentiment as anyone,but also,i am as guilty as anyone as letting it pull me into my own personal resavoir of shadows,and it occoured to me the other morning that i had purpose fully avoided looking towards the horizon at morning,and it is for reasons that go back to the beginning of the new millenium.

back in 99 and 2000,i had drug problems,admittedly,i did before and afterwards also, but my focus is specific in this; i had moved away from my hometown(and i use that term very,very loosely) of Vale,Oregon, in a dsasterous move to twin falls idaho, of which,is apartial basis for my novel in progress,malhuer,in the sping of 99,and in idaho,my habbit had become strengthend, or i had weakend, however you want to look at it,needless to say many things went wrong,and i came running back home, to stay with my mothers for a litte while (i was only 18) while i tried getting my life in some sort of near order.

i moved out, in with a friend of mine, upon her telling me that there was work if i wanted it, doing the sort of manual labor farm work we both were acustom to,so i of course snapped at the offer. with my friend,well, we became more than friens,but unfortunately, some of my bad habbits rubbed off.and some of us are luckier than others.
but,
it was during this time,when we would do our work, usually having to start early on,when we could see the sun rise over the hills which, depending on the season were covered in either alfalfa or wheat or or just plain old sage brush,and seeing the light hit the hills and the brilliant rays seemingly envelop the hillsides like they were aflameand had become more than their value on the planet and were about to jump up into space itself and join in unison with the sun itself.
i am,finally, after all these years gone by,learning how to look at things and realize i am notstranded in memories, only visiting.